Scared Bunny

There's something funny going on right now. You may have noticed infrequent updates. In fact, I know lots of people stopped checking all together. Some even emailed to see if I was OK. As I have never actually been "OK" that was kind of a funny question. I am, however, still alive, still in therapy, still on medications and still single. But some people insist on checking all the time even though there aren't any updates.

The ones that like my writing and those that are concerned I appreciate. But other people are kind of funny. See, they want to see if I am going to write about them. They are petrified I am going to tell their stories. I find it hilarious that someone would be scared of having their story told because, the truth is, and the stories aren't, secrets. These people want their secret kept, but if I have the story, how fucking secret can it be. And who is going to know these huge secrets? It's all about random people who don't even really know who I am.

Now, of course, I could actually use real names, cities, addresses, even phone numbers. And with some of these stories there sure a chance some people might take a little interest in the person or persons involved. I know certain people have very strong feelings about some subjects and don't handle it very well when they hear certain things were done. And those law enforcement and government types… man they sure get nosy when they hear some stories.

I am not sure if they are paranoid (You know, some substances do cause that), obsessed or what. But the network logs all the visitors, so I know when they stop by. And other people using their computers notice what sites they visit, and they tell me when they find out about these little snooping missions.

But I don't have any secrets. All my facts are right here: good, bad and ugly. These people can't say the same thing. They think only a few people know the stories, and they get real scared of what will happen if they get out. But these juicy little secrets have found their way out, and they are getting around. And it all has nothing to do with me. I'd stop worrying about what I write because the parts I'd write would be the funny parts. It's the other stuff that could be life changing for you. It's also important to remember I'm not the one who could profit or benefit from those stories getting out. Sure I could generate a little blog buzz, but it wouldn't get me other things... tangible things... give me power over you. That very well could happen if the bullshit that keeps on happening and has happened for years doesn't stop.

I'm not trying to scare or threaten anyone. If I wanted to write these stories and out these people I'd have done it. But it's not my place and they aren't my stories. But I do want to get a little sense of reality in to a few minds that your past can be used against you, and the more you upset the people in your present the more likely you are to find out how true that is. What I write shouldn't scare you because it would only embarrass you while you read it. What some people say, and who they say it to, is something completely different.

Labels: nosey, paranoid, snoops